when i felt silly

i read the post that i put up last night in my jejune little fiery stupor of faux-rage and think 'my lord, why did i write such things?' because of course this morning i look at what i wrote and how i felt and i realize that those emotions were just temporary, and that, thank buddah, i don't really feel that way. i don't truly believe that i sit on a golden throne overlooking a kingdom of shit. i don't really think i'll always fail or always be rejected. in fact, if i look at it, every situation i've ever been in was not out of the breadth of my control. all i have to do is realize that you can't judge things on a simple day-to-day basis. so i was irritated last night, so what. it probably had little to do with why i thought i was irritated.

what i'm really trying to do it more or less discredit my supine self-pitying self of last night (and other moments). these sorts of things do not have wings and they do not suddenly change or vanish from one day to the next. i like that metaphor. they don't have wings. that's a nice image.

sometimes perhaps i should simply let things be (thanks, hamlet) and just take it with a shrug and say "c'est la vie, non?" because truly that is all life is: a series of moments that, thankfully, gratefully, mercifully, pass.

and rufus' new album is really quite good. i've listened to 'going to a town' at least 8 times in the last two days.